I love the quote by Oscar Wilde, “be yourself, everyone else is taken”. I read this quote somewhere a few years ago and have remembered it ever since. I’m reminded of it today as I sit and watch my daughter simply be content at being herself. I’m sure every mom, at some point in her life, has reveled in the beauty of watching her child grow into a dynamic individual, but today, today I recognized it more than usual and it felt so amazing that I’m having difficulty finding the words to explain it.
In the process of writing “She’s Finding Happy”, I’ve discovered it wasn’t just my daughter’s life long happiness that was at stake during my divorce; but mine as well. I did what most mom’s instinctively do, fight fiercely for our babies and seek out the best possible answers and actions to guide them successfully until they can fly on their own. However, we sometimes forget about ourselves and perhaps get lost in the constant effort to make their lives better. Early on, during the transition to single parenthood, I was lovingly reminded by my very wise, Auntie Ellen, to make a conscious effort to take care of my mind and my heart. For that would be an important building block to raising my daughter. Her insight was beautifully correct and my attitude, my consistent effort to create personal self-acceptance and self-confidence did and still does affect my daughter’s world. I found that my attitude towards just about everything in my life was and continues to be one of the most powerful parenting tools I have, and I don’t think I’ve given it enough credit, until now.
I know I haven’t done everything perfectly, and I’m still working on my parenting skills, but what I can see clearly is the benefit of keeping my head right and by that I mean, focusing on what matters and staying as positive as possible.
Finding the “happy” in life can be a challenge sometimes because let’s face it, life can be difficult. However, happiness is never out of reach, we just each need to figure out how to tap into it by doing things like taking a break now and then. Setting aside time for ourselves. It can also be found by learning to love yourself and all of the many things that make you special, as a woman, as a mom and as a friend. When our children see before them a glimpse of self-acceptance and inner peace in us, they tend to view themselves in the same manner and learn to love who they are and who they will eventually be; this being the building blocks of their self-confidence. Our children, afterall, follow our example and if we are truly happy, we are exuding the kind of attitude that contributes to a successful life. And make no mistake, they are watching our every move.
So, today, I simply want to impart a valuable consideration; to love who you are, embrace your strengths, your weaknesses, be your own cheerleader and focus on the things that make you a vibrant, successful woman. You’ll begin to feel a satisfaction and contentment that will result in a kind of happiness that will overflow into every area of your life, including your child’s life.